Sup folks!  We’re back to talk about movies that the rest of you saw years ago but I’m just now seeing for the first time!  Why would anyone want to read this?  Good question!  Luckily I think we’ve got a couple of movies here that are less well-known and slightly more recent.

First, Kaz and I are turning Japanese and going back in time in the animated The Girl Who Leapt Through Time.  I’m not the biggest fan of anime.  I am, however, a huge fan of animation and there are certain anime properties I really enjoy.  But for the most part, It’s an art form I haven’t delved too deep into.  As far as this movie goes though, I’m not sure how popular it is among anime fans because I’d never really heard of this movie.  I thought it looked interesting so I checked it out, not knowing anything about it.  It’s a charming movie with some pretty fun characters and an interesting concept that wasn’t really explored.  Visually, I think the movie is really great, but other than that, I didn’t get much out of it.  It didn’t help that I really had no idea what happened in the ending.  Maybe it was just something that got lost in translation, I don’t know, but overall, the movie is fun but forgettable.  C

Next, Kaz and I put on our sharp suits and stylish hats to participate in the perfect con in The Brothers Bloom.  Adrien Brody and Mark Ruffalo star as the Brothers Bloom who scam people out of their money through overly elaborate cons.  But, they get into more trouble than they bargain for when their last con, played by Rachel Weisz, becomes unpredictable and the line between con and real life starts to blur.  This, of course is the second film written by Rian Johnson, the third of which being Looper.  For anyone who read my Looper review, I’m sure it will come as no surprise that Johnson is quickly becoming one of my favorite directors, especially after seeing The Brothers Bloom.  This film is genius for so many reasons that I can’t really go into, but most of them involve the spectacular acting by everyone involved, really quirky and smart humor, and the fact that the film constantly makes you question whether what’s happening is real, or all part of Mark Ruffalo’s elaborate scheme.  Johnson now officially has a perfect track record of making wildly inventive and smart films, whether it be a dark, mysterious film noir parody like Brick, an epic, intelligent sci fi thriller like Looper, or a simple quirky comedy like The Brothers Bloom.  Soooo many adjectives!  B

That’s right, I didn’t forget about this.  We’re back with some great movie’s we saw recently

First, Kaz and I took a trip to the most rough-ridingest, gun-fightingest, tuberculosis-havingest town in the west, Tombstone.  Of course I heard all about this movie, but for some reason I never got around to watching it.  Lemme just tell you, this is a man’s man’s movie!  This is a man’s man’s man’s movie!  In fact, these are probably the greatest moustaches I’ve ever seen on film.  Tombstone is one of those really tough, badass westerns that shows how great the genre can be.  But you don’t need me to tell you that; everyone knows that this movie is awesome, so I’ll move on.

Onto a less well-known and more recent film.  Kaz and I got possessed by a murderous demon in Idle Hands.  I have to thank my good buddy, Aidan, for introducing us to this movie.  You guys’ll get to meet him a little later, as he’s kindly agreed to help me with my review for Wreck-it Ralph.  But anyway, back to Idle Hands.  This is a horror comedy starring Jeffrey Sudzin, Seth Green, and Jessica Alba, in which a lazy, good-for nothing teenager suddenly starts going on a killing spree when his right hand is possessed by a demon that wants to find a soul it can drag with it to hell.  I know, awesome, right.  This movie is hilarious, and for all the fans of horror, comedy, or horror comedy out there, this is a flawlessly fun movie.  Seth Green and Elden Henson play the main character, Anton’s two stoner best friends who end up getting killed by the hand and coming back to life as zombies because they said that “the light at the end of the tunnel” was too far away.  These may be two of my favorite characters from any comedy ever.  I only wish I would’ve seen this movie closer to Halloween because it’s the perfect movie to watch with your friends around Halloween.

Max and Kaz review Flight

            And I could fly higher than an eeeeeagle… ‘cause you are the wind beneath my wiiiiiiiings!  ‘Cause you are the wind beneath…

            Anyway, what’s on the agenda for today?  Ah yes, the new Robert Zemeckis film, Flight, of course.  This movie stars Denzel Washington as Captain Whip Whitaker, an alcoholic, drug riddled pilot who miraculously lands his plane after a malfunction, saving almost everyone on board.  But, fate is indeed a cruel mistress, as it’s soon found out that he was under the influence of alcohol and cocaine during the flight.  The subsequent media circus forces Whip to confront his addiction.

            Now, before I start, I just want to make it clear that this movie is not what the trailer makes it out to be for two reasons.  Firstly, in the trailer, the whole fiasco is made out to be some sort of misunderstanding.  Like Denzel was at some kind of party the night before where he had a couple drinks or whatever, but he’s actually a really nice guy caught up in this bad situation..  But from the very first scene you realize that this guy’s kind of a cocky, alcoholic douche.  He’s drinking vodka WHILE he’s flying the plane for Christ’s sake!  Secondly, this movie’s not really about the plane crash or the whole controversy afterwards.  What it’s actually about is a really hopeless alcoholic coming face to face with his problem.  Everything that’s going on with the crash and whether or not Whip caused it is kind of just looming in the background the whole time.  I’m not saying that these are negative things about the movie; I just wanted to debunk a few myths.

            But it’s about time to tell you guys what I thought about this movie.  Well, I liked it for the most part, I guess.  The film just made some really weird choices that kind of threw me for a loop.  I’ll explain later.  First, lemme talk about some of the things I liked about this movie.  First of all, I think Denzel Washington carries this movie.  He’s a great actor and played the part of a conflicted and pitiable drunkard really well.  The movie’s a pretty heartfelt character study and most of the emotion comes from Denzel’s end.  I really like most of the side characters too.  My favorite character in the movie was probably Don Cheadle who plays Whip’s lawyer.  They start out butting heads and really hating each other, but eventually they start working together until Don Cheadle is just the guy who cleans up after Denzel when he gets hammered.  Watching him react to how irresponsible and crazy Denzel is is pretty funny and in the end I found Don Cheadle to be the most relatable.  Also, John Goodman has a small role as Denzel’s drug dealer and it’s hysterical every time he’s onscreen.

            I was pumped to see this movie just from the end of the trailer where you see the plane flying upside down in an attempt to control the descent.  It was a really surreal and haunting image and I thought it set the stage for a pretty badass plane crash.  Sure enough, the movie delivers on that.  The crash is pretty impressive and it was interesting seeing the captain’s point of view for a change.  But besides that, there are a few other scenes or little moments in this movie that are pretty brilliant.  Near the beginning of the movie, Denzel, who’s in the hospital after the accident, has sort of a meet cute situation with Tamara Tunie who’s in the hospital after over-dosing on heroine.  They share a smoke with a dying cancer patient who kind of enlightens the two.  The whole sequence is really well done.  Also, I really like the way this movie ends.  Denzel gives a speech and some stuff happens that’s pretty poetic.

            But this leads me to something that was kinda weird about the movie.  First of all, I think 30 minutes could’ve been shaved from this movie.  No matter how emotional it is, you can only watch Denzel Washington stumble around and screw up so many times.  But the weird thing is something that happens near the ending.  There’s this one pivotal moment that I though was supposed to be tragic.  But suddenly, the film turns into a wacky comedy at the most awkward moment.  All the emotion and investment that I had in the film was kinda cheapened and the movie’s momentarily lost in this vacuum of hollowness.  Now, I like the way they try to resolve the problem.  It was cute and pretty funny, but I couldn’t get with it because of the way the film suddenly throws you this awkward comedy is pretty bizarre.  Everything that happens after this is the stuff I really like, but this scene gives the film a weird structureless feeling because the tone is changing so rapidly.  This may seem trivial, but it brought the film to a screeching halt for me.  It wouldn’t be so disappointing if it weren’t at the ending.

            I don’t think Flight is a bad movie, by any stretch of the imagination.  But the movie is so weighed down by extra baggage, if you’ll excuse the airline pun, that it keeps the movie from being really interesting.  By the end, despite the really well done resolution, the movie comes off as kinda muddled and I found myself lacking the kind of emotional connection that I wanted out of a movie like this.  I’m gonna give it a B, but it’s a pretty low B, just scraping the top of a C.

Max’s Rating- B

Before I post anymore reviews, I figured I should address a very important point.  Just what exactly is the Max and Kaz rating system?  At first glance, it may appear to be a normal A-F rating system, but not exactly.  I’ve added two, extra-special ratings for rare occasions.  You remember that paper you got when you had to write an essay in school?  The teacher would hand you the scoring guide, or whatever they called it.  It had the little numbers on the side and beside them was the description of what you’d have to do to get that score.  Yeah, this is like that.  So, (without further stalling just because I’m too lazy to actually write a review…) What!?  Who said!?  Did someone say something!?

A

This rating is for a movie that has little or no flaws.  Yadda, yadda, you know how an A works.

B

A good movie that’s definitely worth seeing, probably in the theater.  However, there are some flaws in the movie or things that keep it from having that extra oomph that gets you really emotionally involved.

C

A pretty mediocre movie with lots of flaws.  There’s probably some good things about the movie, but it ends up being a battle between “did I hate it more than I liked it or like it more than I hated it?”

D

A pretty piss-poor movie if I do say so myself.  There’s probably some aspect that kept me from completely hating the movie, but overall, this is probably a movie that doesn’t even need to be seen

F

Suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucks

A+

There’ll probably be only one or two of these a year if that.  These movies are that very elite brand of very creative, life-changing, and absolutely spectacular films.  Also, a movie like this probably made me cry

F-

These movies are the absolute worst brand of dog crap cinema.  A movie in this category most likely offended me personally just with it’s awfulness and there’s a pretty good chance I also walked out before the end.

So there you have it.  Just out of the kindness of my heart, I’ve provided this handy little notice for all you guys so that when I give Paranormal Activity 4 an F, you’ll know exactly what it means.  You’re welcome!  …Oh crap, I just ruined my review for Paranormal Activity! Whatever, at least I don’t have to talk about that stupid movie now.

Max and Kaz review The Master

            Okay, so does the title of this film, The Master, refer to Philip Seymour Hoffman’s relationship to Joaquin Phoenix, or does it refer to Paul Thomas Anderson’s continuing campaign to prove that he is indeed the master of filmmaking.  I tell ya, all I heard about this movie before going to see it was “It’s great, brilliant!  Greatest movie ever made!”.  To that, I’d like to reply by using a word pioneered by critics everywhere.  That’s right, I’m about to drop the M-bomb.  Ready… Meh.

            But for now, let’s take a quick look at what this film is about.  Well, Joaquin Phoenix plays a crazy man suffering from severe post-traumatic stress after World War II.  It probably doesn’t help that he’s making his drinks out of paint thinner and bleach and all kinds of other crazy stuff he finds lying around the hardware store.  So this guys a pretty serious screw-up, right?  He’s forgotten how to fit into society.  Then, one clear, moonlit night, Philip Seymour Hoffman rides up on his white horse to save the day.  He lets Joaquin Phoenix stay on the love boat with him and his crazy friends who roam the country, spreading the word of “The Cause”.  And apparently the word has something to do with sending people’s brains back in time or something as we quickly learn, this creepy cult and especially its leader, Philip Seymour Hoffman, are just as crazy as Joaquin Phoenix!  I know you’re confused, but this is just the first twenty minutes of the movie!

            Now I know that Paul Thomas Anderson is known for constantly stretching the boundaries of cinema and doing things the “untraditional” way, but this movie is just all over the place.  But before I start to explain how this movie makes no sense at all, I want to talk about some of the things about this movie that are really good, because there are several.  First of all, the film looks gorgeous.  They got the period down perfectly and never once did I think that this wasn’t taking place in 1950 or whenever the hell it was taking place.  The beginning of the movie, where we see Joaquin Phoenix trying to hold down a job and cope with life, is actually my favorite part of the movie.  It’s mostly shot in some kind of department store, and still the cinematography is beautiful.  Not to mention the fact that it’s hysterical to watch Joaquin Phoenix assault customers for no reason.  Also, the performances in this movie are some of the best I’ve seen all year.  Joaquin Phoenix and Philip Seymour Hoffman (who looks a lot like Jim Gaffigan in this movie) work great off of each other.  It’s really interesting watching Philip Seymour Hoffman just make this weird theology up as he goes along, trying to convince people that he’s creating some new, world-changing movement.  It’s also a lot of fun watching him try to “fix” Joaquin Phoenix when he’s clearly just as insane as he is.

            That’s a lot of praise, right?  I’m sure you’re all thinking, “Well what’s so bad about the movie?  Sounds like a pretty interesting flick to me!  What’s wrong with it?”.  How about the fact that NOTHING HAPPENS!  This movie is literally 143 minutes that leads up to nothing!  Nothing is resolved, no lesson is learned, and by the end, the whole thing just comes off as pointless.  I felt like I was bamboozled into watching a movie that has no emotional highs and lows and ultimately no story.  It’s more like a collection of scenes that are only connected because they feature the same characters and this underlying metaphor of craziness.

            Listen, I’ve got nothing against Paul Thomas Anderson.  I think he’s a truly visionary director who’s made some great, thought-provoking films.  I’m a big fan of There Will be Blood.  But here, it seems like he way over-stepped his bounds and went kind of crazy himself by making a film that isn’t really about anything.  Now I know you assholes are gonna come at me with your pitchforks and torches, telling me that this movie’s actually about L. Ron Hubbard and the whole scientology movement.  But the film tiptoes around that point every chance it gets, lest they bring down the wrath of Xenu.  It’s so clear that P.T. Anderson doesn’t want to offend scientologists that even if that’s what the film was originally about, it got so watered down in its own subtlety that the point is lost.  I, on the other hand, am not worried about stirring up controversy in the scientology community, and have no problem telling you guys that you’re a bunch of crazy weirdos.  Max- 1, Xenu- 0.

            So I guess that’s about it.  There are lots of pretty things to look at in this movie, and really great performances, but by the end, any interest you may have had in the movie goes right out the window when it refuses to give you any kind of resolution.  I spent my entire theater experience watching this movie repeating to myself, “maybe I just don’t get it”, but screw that!  I may be a moron, but I know when a film stops being a thoughtful metaphor and becomes a weird, confusing, Avant-garde mess.  I know I’ve been spewing a lot of hate in this movie’s direction, but that’s just because I’m a drama queen.  In all seriousness, I don’t hate this film.  The way I see it is just an experiment gone wrong.  You tried it, it didn’t work, now let’s move on.  I’d much rather watch a stupid smart movie than a stupid stupid movie.

Max’s Rating- C

Hola amigos!  It’s America’s #1 interspecies movie reviewing team, Max and Kaz!  So I guess you’re probably all wondering what I’m doing typing something that’s not a movie review.  Outside of my little reviews, I don’t bother anyone, that was always the deal, right?  Wrong!  I’m here because the raw power of my epic critiquing skills can’t be contained to just recent blockbusters.  I’m always watching new movies at home too (always… even when I sleep…), and I figured it’d be a real shame if all these craptacular films didn’t get the patented Max n Kaz reviewing treatment (a method now adopted by NASA and Oxford University).  Sadly though, my busy schedule won’t allow any extra time to post things other than my theatrical reviews.  Never fear though!  My good buddy, Kaz, has kindly agreed to step in and post these bulletins for me.  He may not be a very articulate little fuzzball, but he’s a hell of a typist, I’ll tell you that.  So therefore, I hereby announce the beginning of Kaz’s Movie Bulletins!

Here’s how these new posts are gonna work: me and Kaz watch these movies at home, we take notes and summerize our thoughts on the movie, then Kaz posts them on the page.  Easy as powdered gravy, am I right?

Oh hell!  I spent so muh time rambling about useless jibber jabber, that I barely left enough room to actually talk about some movies.  I’d better get into it.  Keep in mind, these bulletins aren’t really the place for long, in-depth reviews, but rather brief summaries.  What, you crazy kids think I’m made of time!?  So anyway, here’s a few movies I just watched for the first time.  Take it away buddy!

Firstly, we went on a crazy adventure, ducking drug dealers and cops with Seth Rogen and James Franco in Pineapple Express.  While not a huge fan of any of the Apatow movies, I found myself really enjoying this film’s craziness and far-gone, off-the-wall brand of stoner humor.  James Franco is great here and the film would be much less memorable without him in it.  B

You guys would be surprised at some of the movies I’ve never seen.  I’ve got lots of, so-called “classic” films that I’m slowly shaving off of my “to watch” list.  As such, Max and Kaz took a trip to Saturday detention and hung out with The Breakfast Club.  One of the most memorable and well-made, teen-rebel movies as well as major staple of the 80’s, I can see why this film is so famous even today.  It’s got very strong character and manages to hold your interest the whole way through, despite it’s limited change of time or location.  It manages to be kinda inspiring without becoming too pandering or cheesy and has a very empowering yet subtle resolution.  A great example of competent filmmaking.  B

So there you have it.  that’s what you can expect from this fresh new line of posts.  If anyone out there likes my stuff, feel free to submit feedback as well as any suggestions you guys have for other movies you want me to review.  In the meantime, keep checking back for more theatrical reviews and bulletins as Kaz and I sail ever-deeper into life’s cinematic maw!  Adios boys and girls!  

Max and Kaz review Sinister

            Well, I guess Halloween is right around the corner.  As such, I’ve got a spooktacular review for all the good little Halloweenies out there.  Oooh!  Smells like bats!

            So Sinister is the newest found footage horror movie.  Like, literally… Ethan Hawke finds some footage and watches it.  The End.  Huh?… you want what?… more!  Ugh, fine.  So a true-crime writer moves into a house that just recently “came on the market” if you know what I mean, with his wife and two children.  One night, while researching the murder that took place in the house, he finds a box of old, Super 8 films in the attic, wherein different families are murdered in various gruesome ways.  Not only that, but strange things start happening in the house and… wackiness ensues.

            So this film is most famous in some circles because of its writer, C. Robert Cargill.  Some of you may know him as former Spill.com critic, Carlyle.  I sure do, and that got me pretty interested in seeing this movie.  From the looks of the trailer, it seemed to stand out from the never-ending torrent of crap that is modern day horror movies.  It couldn’t possibly be as bad as those Paranorman Activity movies or whatever they’re called.

            So I saw this movie the way it should be seen; at 10:00 on a Friday night in a packed theater.  As such, I kinda dug it.  Unfortunately, it didn’t really wow me though.  Granted, it’s a low-key movie and wasn’t really focused on the wow factor, but let me break it down for you.  First of all, this movie has one of my biggest peeves in horror movies and movies in general, too many jump-scares.  Yeah, they scare me and they add some tension to the movie, but you can scare anyone with a loud noise, and the only tension they offer is just the fear of something else jumping out, not because you’re invested in the characters or the story.  That being said, this movie is still pretty creepy most of the way through.  I always find it freaky when someone is looking really close at a picture and you kinda make out an eerie shape or figure in the background.  It’s scary, but you don’t really know why.  It messes with your head.

            However, I think that this film’s biggest strengths are more in the technical aspects.  Watching the movie, I could tell it was made for pretty cheap.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m not trying to rag on the movie.  I actually like that, because there’s almost no CG used throughout the movie.  It feels real, simple and condensed, which is a good atmosphere for this kind of movie.  However, too cheap, and you end up with a moronic concept like Paranormal Activity, that’s made for about 50 bucks and looks like crap.  Why is Paranormal Activity the pinnacle of horror movies nowadays!?!  I’ve seen scarier things in the shower!  Bet you wouldn’t pay 193 million dollars to see that, would you America!!!  God dammit!!!

            Anyways, so Sinister is pretty atmospheric and has an interesting story.  But even the camera work in the movie is kinda cool.  There are lots of times when two people are talking and the camera’s kind of drifting around them.  Even that’s suspenseful, because you’re half expecting something to appear in the background.  Also, I hear a lot of people saying that they’re not crazy about the ending.  I didn’t mind the ending.  I mean, I saw it coming a mile away, but it fit the movie and I didn’t have a problem with it.

            Overall, I like the concept and the feel of the movie, plus the acting’s pretty good on the whole, except for the little girl, but she doesn’t have too many lines, so it’s not a big problem.  However there are points when the movie slows down and gets kind of dull.  Also it doesn’t waver too much from the traditional horror movie formula in terms of build up and payoff.  I found the plot very predictable.  But that doesn’t change the fact that this is still much better than most of the other so-called horror movies out there today (Paranormal Activity!!!… Mother fu…) and the overall concept of the movie is pretty original and creepy.  If you wait until next Halloween and rent this movie with a bunch of your friends, or see it in theater, late at night with a bunch of people, it’ll be perfect.

Max’s Rating- C

Max and Kaz review Looper

            Y’know, I once met my future self.  Yeah, it’s pretty easy actually.  All you have to do is decide a time and a place, say ten minutes from now, that you promise to visit if they ever invent time travel.  Then wait ten minutes and if your future self doesn’t show up, then time travel won’t be invented in your lifetime.  Easy peasy!  Unfortunately, I did show up, and therein lies the heartbreak.  Apparently my idea for sleek, easy-to-clean, glass dentures wasn’t as big of a hit as I’d anticipated.  “A lot of bloody gums and lawsuits”, my words, not mine.

            But at least me and myself got to talk about this awesome movie Looper.  It’s just too bad that time travel couldn’t be used for something useful, like posting this review three weeks ago when the movie was actually released.  But I’m posting it nonetheless, because, and I’m just gonna come right out and say it, I really love this movie!  This is one of those really inventive and smart sci-fi films that comes along once in a blue moon.  But if you want to hear more about that, you’ll have to travel forward in time slightly, because first I’m gonna tell you guys what this movie’s about.

            In the not-too-distant future, The US is in a state of social collapse.  The economy sucks, crime is everywhere and some people have even mutated… but enough about Mitt Romney’s potential presidency.  How about this movie.  So in the year 2074, time travel has been outlawed and is only used by the largest criminal syndicates to get rid of “unwanted baggage”.  Thirty years earlier, the people marked for death are killed and disposed of by a group of elite assassins called Loopers.  Loopers get paid tons of money, but the number one rule is not to let yourself escape.  What I mean by that is, to tie up loose ends, all Loopers must inevitably exterminate their future selves as a form of retirement, and then enjoy the next thirty years as best they can until they eventually get captured and sent back in time to be killed by themselves.  So now that nobody’s confused, let’s move on…

            Joseph Gordon-Levitt plays our main dude who accidentally lets his future self, played by Bruce Willis, get away and must hunt him down take him out before the mob catches up with him.  Man, some people just aren’t cut out to murder people daily with the promise of an eventual murder by their own hands.  Pheh, Noobs.  So anyway, yeah… wackiness ensues.

            Now that that’s out of the way, let’s get into why this movie is so great.  Well, because I say so, that’s why.  But seriously, the reason I love this film so much is because it’s so rich and dense.  There are constantly so many things going on, and so many different aspects at play, and so many different character motivations that the film just engulfs you and your eyes are glued to the screen from beginning to end.  Had the director not been so competent, this could’ve just ended up as one confusing and boring mess.  But the film is so careful to give every different plotline and character a payoff so that nothing feels pointless or shoved in, specifically a plotline that’s hinted at early in the movie and expanded on later.  I’m not gonna spoil anything, but those of you who have seen the movie will know what I’m talking about.  When they really start to explore this concept about half way through the movie, my reaction was something like, “Aw man!  Everything is so tight and well paced.  Don’t ruin it by shoving in this totally pointless… Oh my god, that’s awesome!!!”  They integrate it into the story so well that is seemed like it was there the whole time.

            Another great thing about the really complex and layered plot is the wealth of different emotional rises that the film gets out of you.  For instance, there are some moments near the beginning that had me laughing out loud.  The character interactions are so smart and such a joy to watch.  Especially Jeff Daniels as the boss of all the Loopers and the film’s main bad guy.  He’s not in a whole lot of the movie, but he absolutely knocks it out of the park every time he’s on the screen.  He’s that kind of bad guy that you ultimately hate, but he’s so witty and cool that you love him at the same time.  That’s the mark of a great villain, the guy you love to hate…  Or is it, hate to love?  Either one really.  But then the film goes to these really dark and psychologically disturbing places.  When you find out what happens to Loopers who let their future selves get away, it’s so horrifying that I was having trouble watching.  But it’s great, because then you’re all the more invested in what’s going on.  You really don’t want Joseph Gordon-Levitt to get caught!

            I guess the thing that this film was so famous for, even before it came out, was how they used make-up and prosthetics to make Joseph Gordon-Levitt look more like a young Bruce Willis.  When you saw the trailer, I’m sure you were all thinking like I was, “What the hell’s wrong with Joseph’s face!?!  Was he in a car accident!?!”.  I’m not gonna say the make-up’s bad; they did the best they could.  Most of the time I didn’t notice anything.  But in the scenes where JGL and Bruce Willis are just talking to each other, and there are lots of close-ups, it’s kinda distracting.  I mean, just look at those eyebrows!  Oh my god!  Maybe they should’ve just cast Josh Brolin.  After seeing Men in Black 3, I’m convinced he can play a younger version of any actor.  Hell, as long as we’re on the subject of what-ifs, why not just make this a comedy and cast Donald Glover as a young Bruce Willis!  I’d pay to see it!

            But I have to say, even though JGL is drowned in a bunch of crap on his face, his acting chops still shine through.  Let’s face it, JGL can really only play one character, JGL.  But I’m not tired of watching him play that character.  Are you?  I didn’t think so!  However, the performance that really stood out to me was, surprisingly, Bruce Willis.  Technically, he’s the same person as JGL, but the struggles he went through and the added motivations of the last 30 years create a whole new character, which, of course, makes it all the more interesting to watch them interact.  In the trailer, Bruce Willis is kind of shown to be the bad guy, which isn’t necessarily the case.  Sure, he’s doing some pretty despicable things, and the ultimate goal of the movie is to stop him, but you can really see where the guy’s coming from.  I’ll talk about this some more later.  If you wanna read that you can go into the future etc. blah, blah, blah.  For now, I’ll just wrap this up by saying that Bruce Willis is able to pull off some pretty heart-tugging emotions without saying a word.  In fact, besides the scene where JGL and Bruce Willis are talking in the diner, Bruce Willis doesn’t have much dialogue at all.  Yet, I still think he has the stand-out performance of the movie.  There are a lot of other great actors in the movie like Emily Blunt, Paul Dano and some really creepy little kid, but at the risk of boring you guys to death, I’ll just move on.

            Like I said before, I attribute most of the really great things about this movie to the director, Rian Johnson.  Looper is Johnson’s third film.  His first was Brick which I’m a really big fan of.  His second was The Brothers Bloom which I’ve actually not seen, but I hear really good things about.  In Looper,Johnson really pulls out all the stops though.  He creates a really intense and intellectual sci-fi thriller that is one of the better films I’ve seen this year.  Everything is so carefully thought out and relevant to the conclusion of the story.  For instance, the points I was making about Bruce Willis’ character earlier.  In any other movie, Bruce Willis would’ve just shown up, mumbled some mumbo jumbo about why he’s doing what he’s doing and then our heroes would go to try and stop him.  But in this movie, we actually see what happened to him.  It’s one of the better sequences in the film, where we see JGL kill his future self, get his big payday, and then move on with his life.  He goes through some really intense ups and downs until he eventually becomes Bruce Willis who’s sent back in time and so on.  I won’t say what happens exactly, but my point is that we actually see it and subsequently feel it.  We feel for Bruce Willis’ character and understand his motivations.  It’s really kind of heartbreaking and just adds so much depth to the film.  All of this… great directing, baby!  This, along with Brick is making Rian Johnson one of those really inspired directors who makes films just because he loves the craft.  That’s the best kind.

            I can’t think of a single thing (besides JGL’s crazy Frankenstein face) that I didn’t love about this movie.  The editing and the cinematography are even great!  There are things shot from really far away or scenes that are all one continuous shot.  It’s pretty mesmerizing.  And the whole thing leads up to a conclusion that is so metaphorically perfect… oh man, I can’t even go on.  This is such a great movie.  It’s one of those films that you’re gonna keep thinking about days after you see it.  I LOVE THIS MOVIE!

            Well I guess that’s it, the review’s finally done.  It’s time for you to go back where you came from Future Max.  Oh wait, I almost forgot to ask… I know you’re a penniless wreck in the future, but what about Kaz?  Don’t tell me you dragged him down with you… What’s that?…  No way!!… Chief Secretary, really!?!… Lousy, stupid, rotten…

Max’s Rating- A

Max and Kaz review Frankenweenie

            IT’S ALIIIIIIIIIVE!!!  Finally, Tim Burton’s getting back to his roots!  Like most people, I’m a pretty big Tim Burton fan.  I think as artist, he’s given us some of the most whimsical and memorable images and characters.  But lately, all of his films just seem to be generic or bad (Dark Shadows, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Alice in Wonderland, The Corpse Bride, need I go on?).  I was starting to loose faith in him.  But I’ll be damned if Tim Burton didn’t turn right around and remind me why I’m such a fan of his work.

            So in case you didn’t know, Frankenweenie is based on an old Tim Burton short film.  I like the original Frankenweenie, but it always seemed to me like there was something missing; something that kept it from being really memorable.  Well, after seeing this new film, I realize that this story works a whole lot better as an animated film.  This movie is nothing but classic Tim Burton stop motion animation and I could not be happier.

            The basic story of Frankenweenie is an homage to the original story of Frankenstein.  It’s a cuter, more innocent and quirky reimagining of a classic story.  Essentially, a boy is so aggrieved by the death of his dog, Sparky, that he plans to rebuild him and bring him back to life.  At least, that’s the plot of the original, 30 minute short.  Clearly, the movie’s gonna need more than that, which was probably my biggest fear about this movie before I saw it.  I was afraid that this was just gonna feel padded out and dull seeing as the source material is so condensed.  Well, I’m happy to report that this isn’t the case.  I thought that every new character and storyline that they added felt completely natural and necessary.  At the end, it just turns into a big, crazy monster movie and it could not be more awesome to watch.

            Stop motion is probably my favorite form of animation.  I really appreciate the effort and painstaking tedium that’s required to make a movie like this and I think stop motion is just so mesmerizing and beautiful to watch.  There’s something you get from stop motion that you don’t get from traditional or computer animation.  I don’t know, perhaps it’s the fact that what’s on screen is actually a real, tangible object rather than something on paper or pixels on a computer.  Further more, I couldn’t be happier that these kind of films are still being made.  I never would’ve expected that this year would bear not only one great stop motion movie, but two.

            That being said, I think that this movie once again revolutionizes stop motion and reminds us how effective of an art form it can still be.  Back in 1990, or whenever it was that CG was first starting to be used in movie making , everyone thought that was the end of stop motion.  Well right around that time, Tim Burton released The Nightmare Before Christmas and I don’t need to go into how popular that movie became, do I?  Well, 20 years later, the mystique has worn off again.  Sure, I loved most of the stop motion movies to come out since then, but let’s face it, no one else really did.  Remember that great movie Coraline?  Probably not, right?  My point is, the general public doesn’t really care about stop motion anymore.  “Why is it moving so weird?  It’s all jerky and weird. You guys do know there’s a much easier and faster way to animate things, right?”.  Don’t even start with me.  I guess what I’m really trying to say is that I don’t think this movie is any less memorable or great than The Nightmare Before Christmas.  It’s a beautiful movie with some really funny moments and great character design.  It’s also got a really great adaptation of Tim Burton’s original short.  But it’s not gonna have the same lasting power or connection with people like Nightmare did because people don’t care anymore.  Animation has to be sleek, and fast, and colorful nowadays, or people get bored.  I’m not trying to bash CG animated films or anything; a lot of them are really great.  It just makes me kind of sad because I really like this movie and I think it deserves to be a classic like Nightmare, but sadly, it probably won’t.  Most of the appeal of Nightmare nowadays is just nostalgia anyway, ever since the Emos and Goths stole it.  Damn you Hot Topic! 

            I guess that’s just me though.  The point is I really liked this movie.  There are so many moments that are just so funny and cool throughout this movie.  It’s just fun to see Tim Burton pull out all of the stops and remind us all why he’s a great filmmaker.  I mean, he just has such a distinct and unique design in his animation.  The character designs in this movie are really great, especially the science teacher voiced by Martin Landau.  It just might be one of the greatest and funniest animation designs I’ve ever seen, and that’s saying something.  This is a big passion project for Tim Burton and it shows.  He really put his heart into this and created something that reminds us of the classic Tim Burton stop motion films.

            I’m trying to think if there was anything I really didn’t like about this movie and I don’t think there is.  I guess I would have preferred to see an original property rather than the reimagining of the old short Frankenweenie, but that’s a nit-pick at best.  The stop motion Frankenweenie, is so funny, visually creative and whimsical that I wasn’t even thinking about that while watching it.  Ultimately, I like this movie a lot better than the original short.  Go ahead, call blasphemy and tell me how full of crap I am.  But I’m a sucker for stop motion and this is a great movie, so there!

            It’s not like this movie got me really excited or emotional.  In other words, I’m not gonna give it an A.  But that’s just the kind of movie it is.  It’s a low-key movie and for what it’s trying to do I say it succeeded totally.  I can’t tell you guys how happy I was walking out of the theater.  This movie put a huge smile on my face and I can’t wait to have this in my collection right next to The Nightmare Before Christmas.  It’s a great Halloween movie and I think that if you guys get the chance, you should really check it out.

Max’s Rating- B

This is in response to my review of Pitch Perfect. I had some time to think about it, and remembered a time when projectile vomiting was hilarious